After divorce or the end of a long-term relationship, men tend to live alone for about three months before pairing up again.  It’s easier for women to bounce back after divorce. Men tend to think of themselves as the independent one on the relationship but what they often find is that they’re actually dependent on the woman in their life. When that woman is gone, they begin the quest to find someone to fill that role.

Though not always the case, men often don’t know what they’ve got till it’s gone. They don’t realize that women do a lot of things that are integral parts of life, and they take them for granted. Women tend to take charge of the social calendar,  nurture the relationship, and take care of a myriad of details. In this way, men need women but sometimes don’t want to admit it. This can make being single after a long-term relationship that much harder.

This comes from the wound they have from childhood when they’re separating from their mother and learning to be masculine. But often this happens before they’re truly ready and into adulthood they continue to seek out women who can fill this nurturing void.

While women naturally do better after a split, that doesn’t mean that men can’t rebound healthfully – and it’s imperative that they do. Since so many second marriages also end in divorce, they need to think especially hard before jumping right back into the relationship game. Men should ask themselves what they want and need in their next partner to discover what, if any, voids they’re trying to fill. Instead of spending energy after a breakup looking for the next relationship, men should take that time to work on themselves and how to grow as a person in the areas where they may have been relying on their partner.