How to score a touchdown with your partner during the football playoffs
I recommend making love (having sex) during halftime, give it a try you might be pleasantly surprised.
30 million viewers or more usually watch the football playoffs starting this Saturday and Sunday. Making love burns calories to offset by your fixing your partner’s and your favorite food during the playoffs. You can do your own “tackling” and cuddling while watching which elicits that cuddle hormone ” oxytocin,” that gives a “rush” and a real “high,” equivalent to the touchdown of the playoffs.
Every savvy woman knows how much football means to her partner, so if you can’t lick ’em join ’em. This is a great way to connect with him during halftime. If you support his passion, the “passion” will be returned in spades to you.
Here are some Smartheart tips from my Make Up, Don’t Break Up book to encourage those Pom poms, even if you need to “dust” them off. Make halftime your time with these skills that I call the “running drills.”
- Stay on the sidelines as you watch, no talking at all and especially avoiding hot topics. There is only one announcer allowed, and that’s the one on the television.
- As my grandma always said, the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, so surprise him with his favorites during the games. The PEA in dark chocolate is a high full of antioxidants and acts as an aphrodisiac for “touching down,” try it.
- Another thing you can do is to read up on what team is playing, who the quarterback and running backs are. Your partner will be amused and feel closer to you that you took the interest by prioritizing what’s important to him. You can also download the NFL app for stats and predictions, and you will see doing this might even affect him remembering a card and celebrating valentine’s day with you as you like it. One of my patients got a proposal after watching football with her partner without moaning and complaining. She even said that this gets her the academy award for a lifetime. A trophy from her partner!
Enjoy the games this weekend!
I would love to hear how everything turned out. Please feel free to email me and share your experiences.
Here is to finding and keeping real love!
Dr. Bonnie Eaker-Weil (Dr. Bonnie) is a relationship expert known as one of America’s best therapists, and by New York Magazine as one of New York City’s best therapists. US Commerce Association voted Dr. Bonnie Best Therapist 2011-2017.
Known as “The Adultery Buster” and the “No. 1 Love Expert,” she is the best-selling author of Adultery: The Forgivable Sin (adapted into a Lifetime movie starring actress Kate Jackson), Make Up, Don’t Break Up: Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples, Can We Cure and Forgive Adultery?, Staying Not Straying, How Not to (S)mother Your Man and Keep a Woman Happy, and Financial Infidelity; The #1 Relationship Wrecker.
Even When Sleeping Separately, You’re Not Just Roommates
The National Sleep Foundation found that 1 in 4 married couples sleep in separate bedrooms! The National Association of Homebuilders predicted this years ago and started building dual master bedrooms as the new norm for custom houses. Different sleep schedules, snoring, and restless leg syndrome make it hard to sleep together, so people sleep separately instead. Couples can feel shame and worry about what sleeping in separate bedrooms means, but it’s becoming less of an indicator of fear of intimacy to those who opt for this arrangement to prevent fights or distance.
Even though it’s becoming more acceptable, you’re missing out on some of the most important bedtime rituals. Couples kiss and cuddle and have romantic and significant pillow talk before bed, especially when they go to bed at the same time. Some say you can still do that, and then go to separate bedrooms for sleeping. Some compensate by eating dinner together and spending more time together during waking hours. What happens outside the bedroom sets up what happens inside the bedroom. Set up romance magic. The cuddle hormone, Oxytocin, is activated by cuddling and sex and is needed even if you are in separate bedrooms. Many of my patients feel rejected when their partner retreats to different bedrooms. They feel like roommates, if they are not practicing romance magic in addition. “Not just roommates” has to be reinforced to restore and maintain sizzle-including goodnight and pillow talk rituals! This is essential connecting time. to be put in place even stronger with emotional and physical intimacy a real priority to negate the fallout of sleeping in separate bedrooms. In cases of snoring and separate bedrooms, these tips can save a marriage.
Join my Education2Go course for more tips on romance magic http://www.ed2go.com/
https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation-now/2017/03/30/why-so-many-married-couples-sleeping-separate-beds/99818086/
Is your partner narcissistic?
These are the questions to ask:
- Does he disconnect and expect to pick up and reconnect where he left off with no explanation?
- Does he talk the talk , but not walk the walk?
- Does he show no empathy if he hurts you?
- Does he accuse you of overreacting rather than take accountability for his actions?
- Does he blame you for wanting too much when he disappoints you?
- Does he project his shortcomings onto you?
- Is he allergic to your emotions and discussions?
If you answered yes to these questions, it’s time to learn what to do with and how to handle a narcissistic partner.
Many that are narcissistic are actually connectable by instruction with learned “Smart Heart Skills.”
Watch and share Dr. Bonnie’s video on narcissistic partners:
For more tips check out my online education2go course. Why not invite your partner to join you? https://www.ed2go.com/online-cou…/marriage-and-relationships
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“I will connect with you, detach myself from my own thoughts and intentions so I can hear you and walk in your shoes”
This is an example of a SmartHeart Vow from real-life couples. They are demonstrating fighting fair as seen in free bonus video that comes with purchase of Dr. Bonnie’s book, Make Up, Don’t Break Up: https://www.amazon.com/Make-Up-Dont-Break-Fin…/…/ref=sr_1_2…
Never underestimate the power of love and never take it for granted!
When the Chill Sets In, Turn Up the Heat
As another cold front passes through the Northeast, couples should use it as an excuse to make some long-lasting winter memories. Not being able to get to scheduled appointments – like work, school, meetings, etc – can be stressful. Instead of getting stressed, use the mandatory down-time to rekindle a spark with their significant other. It can be important to refocus this downtime and feel like it’s being put to good use. Here are a few of the things I recommend to have a winter affair with your own partner:
Mix up a hot drink and then cozy up with each other. Whether it’s hot chocolate or hot toddy, getting warm together doesn’t HAVE to involve sex! Start out with something simple like a drink to warm up and snuggle up together by reading a book, playing a game, or beginning a project.
Let it lead to sex. Studies show that during big storms people usually make love, make babies or fight. Starting by reconnecting with something simple (a book, a game, etc.), can lead to a more intimate conclusion. Make the most of your time indoors, since there’s nowhere else to go, even if you wanted to. Instead of letting obligations cause stress, let go of responsibilities by having an affair with your own partner. I mention this technique in my book, Make up Don’t Break up, where I give couples tools for rekindling romance.
Get outside. That’s right ~ it may be cold but when people don’t have anywhere to be, why not relive the excitement that snow days brought as a kid? These types of opportunities often bring out our inner child, so go with it, get playful and see where it leads. Couples may learn something new about each other, discover something new they can do together (who doesn’t love making snowmen?), and if nothing else, have a good time goofing around together. Recreate the chemicals you experienced when you first fell in love. Take this opportunity to give a 30 second kiss and/or 20 second hug to reconnect and fall back in love.
Trouble in Paradise: Dr. Bonnie Provides Antidote for Illicit ‘Cheat Retreat’
Dr. Bonnie responds to the most shocking cheating strategy in the works since Ashley Madison with her ground-breaking solution to “cure” infidelity.
Recently, news of a “cheat retreat” hit the wires outlining Illicit Encounters’ latest business plan to build a “sex island” off the U.K. coast where spouses can go to carry out their secret affairs and effectively get away with it. The Island offers their guests guaranteed secrecy with a wide range of professional services to help guests cover their tracks. This new practice of adultery takes scandal and deception to the next level and Dr. Bonnie has something big to say about it.
“The development of an institutional practice encouraging cheaters to ‘hideaway’ with even more lying and faking should be a major wakeup call. It’s a fundamental change in the way we’re thinking about relationships and love, and we need to understand the root cause of this phenomenon in order to fix it. Only 35 percent of couples stay together when adultery occurs…and it does not have to be that way. Getting rid of a person does not get rid of the problem,” says Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil, renowned relationship therapist and author of Adultery the Forgivable Sin and Make Up, Don’t Breakup.
Her theory biochemical craving for connection explains adultery as a method of self-medication due to a blood sugar and brain chemical imbalance. During times of loss, separation, or stress, these imbalances are amplified and, if not treated, cause behaviors like addiction and adultery for temporary relief. Dr. Bonnie asserts that with the appropriate psychotherapy, which includes her revolutionary “smart heart dialogue,” we can reverse and correct the imbalances driving this destructive, thrill-seeking behavior.
Check out Dr. Bonnie’s expertise highlighted on the Discovery Health Channel:
Sign up for Dr. Bonnie’s my Ed2Go course on adultery prevention: marriage and relationships: keys to success here: http://www.ed2go.com/online-courses/marriage-and-relationships
Q&A with Dr. Bonnie Weil
New Life Only a Click Away
I recently saw a heart-breaking story in The New York Times http://www.nytimes.com/2011/11/06/fashion/in-a-divorce-the-clicks-of-a-mouse-modern-love.html?_r=1&pagewanted=1&ref=fashion&src=me from a woman whose husband had been having an affair with a woman he met online, unbeknown to her. Perhaps even more tragically, this story is not that uncommon. In fact there are a number of statistics that reveal how widespread this has become:
Internet users devote three hours per week to online sexual exploits (MSNBC.com)
- -Statistics show more than 72,000 sexually explicit sites on the web and an estimated 266 new porn sites being added each day. These sites alone generate a revenue of $1 billion dollars each year.
(Harding Institute) - One in 10 respondents said they are addicted to sex and the Internet
(MSNBC.com and Dr. Alvin Cooper)
It’s become overly simple to meet someone online for sex – in fact it’s more difficult to avoid these types of propositions than it is to take advantage of them, as the woman in the article found when, following her divorce, she did a little online sex research of her own:
[After posting my ad] I refreshed my e-mail and a dozen more replies showed up. Within the hour I had more than 100. I was appalled but also flattered
Needless to say, these types of encounters are easy to procure and appear much less high-risk than attempting to pick someone up in real life. However, the real life consequences are just as devastating. It’s a way of over-riding true emotions by opting for a “high” of a sexual encounter instead. It could be the case that people looking for casual encounters via the internet are seeking out a way to mask the fact that they don’t want to deal with their emotions or don’t know how to engage in true intimacy. It’s a way of acting out – not talking out – extreme feelings in a person’s life. People who utilize the internet for these types of “relationships” are typically just in it for the high the feel in the moment without examining what’s making them seek that high.
When one person in a couple suffers from this need for thrill-seeking behavior it’s imperative that the person communicate with their partner – and with themselves – as to what’s leading them into this pattern. As I suggest in the documentary, Unfaithful (featured on the OWN Network), it’s imperative to dig deeper than indulging a momentary desire and learn what feeds the need to act in such a way.
In this sense, the course of action for dealing with this behavior is the same as if it weren’t fueled by technology. However the ever-presence of sex online has made this type of thrill-seeking much more accessible, and seem much less risky. This perception is just not true. Engaging in an affair – online, offline or otherwise – is fraught with risk and reveals relationship shortcomings that need to be talked out, not acted out.
Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil, PhD, author of the 2010 NY Times Reader’s Choice Award winning book Make Up Don’t Break Up with accompanying DVD Falling in Love and Staying In Love counsels couples considering breaking up, people who have committed adultery, and couples who want to strengthen their relationships damaged by resentment or unresolved anger, teaching people to “fight” to increase passion, bring back magic and restore the sizzle. Dr. Bonnie teaches Smart Heart Dialogue along with communication and connection tools, and counsels families and children.
Known as “The Adultery Buster” and the “No. 1 Love Expert,” she is the best-selling author of Adultery: The Forgivable Sin (adapted into a Lifetime movie starring actress Kate Jackson) Coming Nov 2011 as eBook, Make Up Don’t Break Up, Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples (Revised edition Feb 2010, including DVD How to Fall in Love and Stay in Love for Singles and Couples), Can We Cure and Forgive Adultery?, How Not to (S)mother Your Man and Keep a Woman Happy, and Financial Infidelity.
Dr. Bonnie has appeared on a Discovery Health documentary titled “Unfaithful” and A&E on addictions. ABC’s Good Morning America, a three-day series on NBC’s The Today Show, The Oprah Winfrey Show five times, a four day series on Fox TV regarding dating. She appears frequently on ABC, Fox, CBS and NBC News, The View, 20/20, and CNN. Visit Dr. Bonnie at http://www.DoctorBonnie.com.
How to Save the Love of Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries… and they said it wouldn’t last!
Upon the news of the pending divorce between Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries, Dr. Bonnie Weil weighs on on what may have caused this domino effect of Lust/Love. This is a good example of when the “honeymoan” stage takes and sweeps a person into a different level. They say parents are better at picking a partner as people get swept away in the new love feeling. When the honeymoon ends, the power struggle begins… that is the beginning of the end!
“The endorphins from the honeymoon stage have worn off, and what you are left with is reality! We love the feeling of euphoria and utopia of the honeymoon stage.” says Dr. Bonnie. A couple must have a good foundation and the tools, in which Dr Bonnie provides with her ground breaking Smart Heart Skills and Dialogue in which have saved 98% of the couples she counsels. Dr. Bonnie teaches her patients that the the bridge to real-life love is stopping along the way to the power struggle stage. “We always pick a person that gives us the most trouble, so we can grow and become a better person. The thing that you love about your partner in the beginning you end up hating in the end. It wears on you like chalk on a black board!” Dr. Bonnie sees often in her practice. Smart heart Skills and Dialogue gives you the “know how” to navigate after the heart pounding honeymoon stage to the comfort, safe, real life love stage. “The problem is most don’t hang around long enough to get to the real life love because they don’t believe and know how to do it” says Dr. Bonnie. “They leave when the going gets rough instead of staying the course. This is what is wrong with Narcissistic “Greed/Me” generation that we live in.” states Dr. Bonnie.
According to The New York Post http://tinyurl.com/3zojvxx Kris Humphries learned of the divorce filing via TMZ just as the world found out. “This is the ultimate betrayal finding out via media, it is very hostile way to get back at a person.” quotes Dr. Bonnie.
Dr. Bonnie feels “Kim fell in love with love. Her biological clock is ticking and she may have felt pressure from the nuptials of her sister Khloe and the baby of sister Kourtney. Love is like the game monopoly. They went to the power struggle stage from honeymoon and did not pass Go. They jumped out too soon.” Everybody wants everything now but it is through the struggle that we become stronger and closer, that power struggle is what bonds a couple. They allowed that struggle to break them instead of strengthen them.
Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil (Dr. Bonnie) is a relationship expert who was named by Psychology Today as one of America’s best therapists, and by New York Magazine as one of New York City’s best therapists. She was recently honored with the 2011 New York Award in the Physicians category by the USCA “Best of Local Business Award. She is known as “The Adultery Buster” and the “No. 1 Love Expert,” she is the best-selling author of Adultery: The Forgivable Sin (adapted into a Lifetime movie starring actress Kate Jackson), Make Up Don’t Break Up, Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples (Revised edition Feb 2010, including DVD How to Fall in Love and Stay in Love for Singles and Couples) and winner of the NY Times Reader’s Choice award for best dating book 2010, Can We Cure and Forgive Adultery?, Staying Not Straying, How Not to (S)mother Your Man and Keep a Woman Happy, and Financial Infidelity (Making Money Sexy).
Dr. Bonnie has appeared on a Discovery Health documentary titled “Unfaithful” and A&E on addictions. ABC’s Good Morning America, a three-day series on NBC’s The Today Show, The Oprah Winfrey Show five times, a four day series on Fox TV regarding dating. She appears frequently on ABC, Fox, CBS and NBC News, The View, 20/20, and CNN.
Another Reason to Love Marriage: Longevity
New York, NY…………… If you feel like fixing the car one more time or taking out another load of laundry might kill you – think again. Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil, Ph.D, comments on a study revealing that getting married could extend your life for up to 17 years: “In this case, a longer lifespan likely has to do with human touch and interaction. For example, babies can thrive without sight, without smell, even without hearing. But they cannot thrive without being touched.”
The study published in the American Journal Of Epidemiology shows that single men have a 32 percent higher chance of death across their lifetimes than their married counter parts. This means that they could die eight to 17 years prior to the average married man. Statistics for women are better: they face a life expectancy shortened by about seven to 15 years on average.
The lack of continued attention and affection over a lifetime can manifest in what Dr. Bonnie calls a Bio-chemical Craving for Connection, due to dealing with things like stress, separation and loss. People who experience this craving are more likely to engage in risky behaviors as they seek out a “high” that will mitigate the pain they’ve experienced.
Conversely, people in relationships typically receive a positive type of “high” without even knowing it. “Oxytocin, the “cuddle hormone,” provides warmth and security,” explains Dr. Bonnie. Love reduces stress and makes a person happy.” Touch is important – we see that much from the start of our lives: infants deprived of affection will literally perish from a syndrome called “failure to thrive”. “Babies can thrive without sight, without smell, even without hearing. But they cannot thrive without being touched,” says Dr. Bonnie Weil. This is something that doesn’t change much over our lifetimes – as adults we still thrive most in affectionate environments.
Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil (Dr. Bonnie) is a relationship expert who was named by Psychology Today as one of America’s best therapists, and by New York Magazine as one of New York City’s best therapists. Her book, Make Up Don’t Break Up recently won the New York Times “Relationship Book of the Year” award.
Known as “The Adultery Buster” and the “No. 1 Love Expert,” she is the best-selling author of Adultery: The Forgivable Sin (adapted into a Lifetime movie starring actress Kate Jackson), Make Up Don’t Break Up, Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples (Revised edition Feb 2010, including DVD How to Fall in Love and Stay in Love for Singles and Couples), Can We Cure and Forgive Adultery?, Staying Not Straying, How Not to (S)mother Your Man and Keep a Woman Happy, and Financial Infidelity (Making Money Sexy).
Renee Talon, Renee at DoctorBonnie dot com or phone 941-429-8803
Dr. Bonnie has 2 Press Release writers. Available if anyone would like to speak about our services.
Is Sex Higher During Hurricanes?
New York, NY……..People in areas of the country that rarely see any inclement weather besides snow, are prepping for a hurricane this weekend. People typically spend more time inside during a hurricane than they would even in a snow storm, and they may be edgy about the weather.
This, says Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil, gives couples a chance to connect and spend more time together than they would normally. In her book, Make Up, Don’t Break Up, Dr.Bonnie mentions that weather can be a catalyst for physical intimacy. It’s of course important to do everything possible to stay safe physically, but there are some emotional benefits to be gleaned from this experience if we can slow down and notice them.
Conversely, bad weather can make people nervous, claustrophobic, foster addictions and increase eating. Some people may use this as an excuse to further their bad habits, but instead of relying on these crutches – which really just exacerbate the stress and nervousness – make time with your partner for snuggling, talking and kissing. Don’t just watch television, says Dr. Bonnie! Instead, use this time productively, to connect with your partner and deal with any problems that arise in a healthy way.
And stay safe!
Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil (Dr. Bonnie) is a relationship expert who was named by Psychology Today as one of America’s best therapists, and by New York Magazine as one of New York City’s best therapists. Her book, Make Up Don’t Break Up recently won the New York Times “Relationship Book of the Year” award.
Known as “The Adultery Buster” and the “No. 1 Love Expert,” she is the best-selling author of Adultery: The Forgivable Sin (adapted into a Lifetime movie starring actress Kate Jackson), Make Up Don’t Break Up, Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples (Revised edition Feb 2010, including DVD How to Fall in Love and Stay in Love for Singles and Couples), Can We Cure and Forgive Adultery?, Staying Not Straying, How Not to (S)mother Your Man and Keep a Woman Happy, and Financial Infidelity (Making Money Sexy).
Renee Talon, Renee at DoctorBonnie dot com or phone 941-429-8803Dr. Bonnie has 2 Press Release writers. Available if anyone would like to speak about our services.