Are you or your partner at risk for burnout which always leads to cheating?

Here are the warning signs:

• Do you have less or no empathy, only going through the motions (just checking off the list or the box)?
• Not in the moment?
• Never feel it’s good enough ?
• No time and you’ve stopped doing the things you love? You are into “supposed to’s” not want to’s?
• You do not think you should rest or chill lax (relax or chill) and never find the time for yourself?
• You don’t know the word NO or your partner does not take that seriously, cheerleading you into burnout “yes”!
• Do you disengage from socializing?
• Are you low energy?
• Wake up tired?
• Sleep less then the recommended 7 or 8 hrs?
• Eat junk or comfort food to gain energy and self medicate and to stress bust?
• Low sex drive?
• Joyless?

All her adultery patients suffer from this, a “biochemical craving for connection.” Burnout from high stress causing low energy, and sleep which should be first is last on the list of priorities. Lack of sleep causes cravings for carbs, sugar and comfort foods to overcompensate, but both are culprits for self-medicating adulterous behavior (poor impulsive choices, decisions, and judgement), lack of clarity in the brain.

For success and FIDELITY in a relationship sleep and healthy diet need to be as much a priority as daily affirmations and gratitude to your partner not criticism.

Monogamy is a conscious choice and when burnout takes over you are UNCONSCIOUS!

“No wonder cheating is so rampant because burnout is!!”, says Dr. Bonnie

Here is the prescription to cheat proof and burnout proof your relationship :

1. Make time daily and weekly for things you love that bring you or your partner joy (no excuses)!
2. Affirmations and gratitude daily before bed and awakening for what you do have and have accomplished
3. Unplug, no excuses, hour a day and connect connect connect and socialize face to face eye to eye!!!
4. Say no when you feel like saying yes
5. Weekends are for chill laxing, not chores, if you can pay someone or ask for help from family, you need time for yourself to do nothing!, a guilt free weekend of leisure time. Many affairs, my patients tell me, are to “go on vacation”, leisure to get away from it all, stress, work, without the guilt.

Of course affairs give you more guilt !!

So makeup don’t break up with yourself or your partner.

For a consult to see if you’re ripe for an affair or relationship burnout, call Doctor Bonnie at 212-606-3787

Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil has over 30 years of experience as a counselor and therapist, and specializes in issues related to dating, marriage, divorce, and infidelity. She has authored books about relationships including Best Seller and Readers Choice Award winning book Make Up, Don’t Break Up; Financial Infidelity; Can We Cure and Forgive Adultery (Introducing her new theory and treatment of adultery as a disease) and Adultery: The Forgivable Sin.