Financial Infidelity: Define the Currency of Your Relationship
When it comes to financial infidelity, there is no such thing as an innocent financial fib. Financial infidelity is a subtle form of cheating, so much so, people do not even know they are even doing it, it’s so subtle. In a poll, 40% of all adults in a committed relationship admitted to lying to their partner regarding spending and 82% hide purchases from their partner, which is obviously financial infidelity.
Did you know that there is a link between financial infidelity and infidelity as both are betrayal and secrets and betrayal can breed more betrayal?
Did you know that there is a link between credit card debt and the frontal cortex of the brain?
My theory on financial infidelity is similar to my theory on Adultery, which I see as a disease.
To learn more about it read Financial Infidelity: Seven Steps to Conquering the #1 Relationship Wrecker and see how credit card debt and what you eat, and how you behave with money is very connected to a physiological problem, and a disease as well.
Couples need to have money conversations weekly, but they are overwhelmed most of the time. Because opposites attract, when they pick each other, they often find that a spender marries a saver and a saver will marry a spender, and that causes conflicts when they have these talks. Using the Smartheart Skills and Dialogues, you can create the intimacy of the relationship and have passion you’ve dreamed of. Without the talk, the intimacy, the relationship, and passion are compromised.
I developed Smartheart Skills and Dialogues and Money Talk as the glue to renew passion. These skills and dialogues enhance mutuality, clarity, and safety which fosters mystery, sizzle and ultimately romance magic. Here are links to my videos on financial infidelity: Financial Infidelity Video #1 and Financial Infidelity Video #2
Below are two affirmation exercises I would like you to begin using with your partner:
Exercise: Money Affirmations
Each day list five (5) positive things about your current financial situation that you are truly grateful for. Let go of any negative thoughts such as “not enough” or need more.” Appreciate and be grateful for what your money has done for you: “a home to live in,” “good food to eat,” “the opportunity to socialize with friends.”
Begin each day with these thoughts of gratitude. Post this list where your partner can set it, and verbalize these thoughts to yourself and each other throughout the day.
Exercise: Partner Affirmations
Each day list five (5) things about your partner that you are truly grateful for. Do not list material things. You may be grateful he is healthy, that she comes from a loving family, that he’s attractive, that he doesn’t snore.
Begin each day with these thoughts of what you most appreciate. Post this list where your partner can see it and verbalize each of these thoughts to yourself and each other throughout the day.
For more on how to use my Smartheart Skills and Dialogues Money Talk, whether you are single or married, it is all in my book Financial Infidelity: Seven Steps to Conquering the #1 Relationship Wrecker.
Whether you are married or single and have been trying to work on your relationship for years, I am here to help.
In only 30 minutes, I’d like to help you have a major breakthrough in what may feel like a nightmare relationship and turn into YOUR dream relationship. Go here to apply for your FREE phone session.
Here is to finding and keeping real love!
Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil
Love and Relationship Expert
3 Signs It May Be Time for You to Have a Relationship Mentor
Many people I meet with that are having relationship challenges, need more than a few sessions with a therapist. What they really need is a relationship mentor; someone that can help them shorten the learning curve in having their ideal relationship whether married or single.
Many more try to do it all alone only to find themselves stuck and never truly living the relationship bliss that is available to them with some clear direction and guidance.
Are you struggling with a relationship that has lost it’s sizzle?
Are you looking to attract the man or woman of your dreams and not having much luck?
Are you plagued by money problems in your relationship?
Have you or your partner had an affair, and the trust is gone?
Have you found yourself in a relationship that feels unsatisfying or just toxic?
All the while thinking that this is what marriage or partnering is and you need to just deal with it. If so, exploring the possibility of having a relationship mentor may be a good next step.
In many cases people I end up working with, as a relationship mentor, feel like they have no other choice if divorce is not an option because of kids, religious beliefs, etc.Not everyone is ready to have a relationship mentor, but there are signs that this may be the time to consider exploring the idea.
Here are a few:
- You and your partner seem to be arguing a lot, always about the same thing. Never getting any headway. – Did you know that conflict can be healthy and necessary for passion? But it’s essential to know how to bring on the sizzle with fighting fair.
- You suspect an affair, or there has been one, and it’s not working. – Maybe you’ve had traditional talk therapy, but it really hasn’t established a real sense of trust that it won’t happen again. – I treat adultery as a physiological disease and have a groundbreaking approach that has a 98% cure rate using my integrated approach.
- Money or finances is a big issue in your relationship. – Money is the number one relationship wrecker because opposites often attract. A relationship usually has one spender and one saver type, so you have to learn how to have conversations about touchy subjects like money and sex in a way that helps you both get your needs met.
- There are commitment issues. – Your partner is moody, selfish, uncooperative, or narcissistic and you are breaking up or want to break up.
You see, I know what it feels like to want a great relationship and doubt HOW to actually do it. That is how I came to create my Ideal Relationship Mentor system. It works with couples, singles or even just one person.
I know most relationships can be saved if you have the right support and guidance.
I am blessed to have worked as a relationship therapist and mentor for over 35 years, to help people with relationship problems that many felt could not be solved. Many had worked with therapists and had just about given up when they found me. I have a global phone-based practice, so I can work with people all over the world and for those that want in person support, I have a private practice in New York City. I am so grateful to have a 98% success rate!
In only 30 minutes, I’d like to help you have a major breakthrough in what has felt like a relationship nightmare.
Typically, private relationship breakthrough session calls with me cost a minimum of $400. Why am I doing this for free? Because I know if you have some loving direction and support, YOU can be successful NOW, and I want to support you and the success of your relationship.
Whether you are married or single and have been trying to work on your relationship for years, I am here to help!
BUT I only have 10 spots available for a complimentary breakthrough session on the phone.
My gift to you is available for 72 hours. Reserve a spot to chat with me at a time — within the next 4 weeks — that works for you!
Reserve your spot now, so you can have a clear plan that will propel you to a more successful relationship in the next 90 days or less.
These sessions will be handpicked and qualified based on your level of interest, commitment, and the order it was received. We will determine your qualifications based on a simple questionnaire that you can complete in as little as 5 minutes.
Wouldn’t it be great to have your plan in place to have the fulfilling relationship you deserve now?
Here’s what people are saying:
Using your techniques to overcome the issues in my 4-year relationship… I am now happily remarried, living in London and loving my work helping others to create successful relationships and to move forward with their lives after bereavement.
~ Shelly Dr. Bonnie – Thank you so much for your amazing material. It’s my bible when dealing with men. I’ve even had clients say “if I had this book ….years ago I wouldn’t have lost my boyfriend/husband wouldn’t have had an affair… etc.
I myself am now only just now embarking on a serious search for a relationship and your book has the pages tabbed and marked with highlighted. Ha Ha! ~S. Courtis
Here is to finding and keeping real love!
Love and Relationship Expert